I want to address the general truth that fangirls generally never have boyfriends because they have X idol. In this case, Jonghyun. With his tongue sticking out, licking his upper lip. Yep.
I became introduced to kpop when I first heard about Rain being on top of Time Magazine’s poll on the 100 most influential people (I was still a nerd in middle school), and I was curious, and I was instantly amazed that an Asian person could be so much like an Usher. The body (Asians have pecs?), the voice, and have a pretty good music video (the wings stretching out in I’m Coming!).
Slowly, but surely, I became saturated with the Korean pop industry, and I became so used to androgynous males and hyper-feminized girls, that most of the time I never blink an eye when I see a over-metrosexual man. I don’t find anything wrong for men to have manicures, expertly done hair, a little makeup, and slender bodies. To giggle and be shy.
At the same time, I still watch American TV, but the Dr. McDreamy and Dr. McSteamy in Grey’s Anatomy that sort of entranced me in the beginning now held no attraction for me. I really liked the sarcasm of Christina, though, so I kept watching. I noticed that in every single Korean drama, there would be one male that I would think was absurdly good-looking. In every American television show, I would lucky if I could even find a decent-looking one after every 10 shows.
I am faced with the sad conclusion that because of my immersion into Korean pop, I’ve lost all my taste for Caucasian men. Statistically, I will end up marrying a Caucasian, but I no longer think them as attractive as, say, X idol. These idols have given us an ideal that is nearly impossible to fulfill in real life, and this ideal does not prevent us necessarily from seeking out men– the opposite probably occurs. We compulsively check out more guys than usual because so few match Jonghyun-tongue-out standards.
Then this pathetic state of not having a partner leads us to proclaim (quite pathetically), who needs a boyfriend when we have Jonghyun-xi?!! And stare at a bajillion pictures of some barely legal pictures of a shirtless Taemin even if you’re a totally old noona.
I just want all of us to recognize what we have become, and stop becoming obsessive, that it’s all right to dream, but it’s not all right to assume that these silly dreams will become reality. It’s not all right to fantasize about Jonghyun being your boyfriend, because he’s going to be my husband.
I’m just joking, but I urge you to consider what type of fan you are, and recognize the limits. Recognize the idols’ limits. Recognize that Jonghyun probably sucks at cooking, so you wouldn’t want him as your husband. Some may argue that as idols, they encourage fervent idolatry– yes, in part, they do bring this on themselves, but remember, they’re still boys growing up who suck at cooking.